Alternative title #2: Apparently My Life Lacks Focus
Alternative title #3: If I Had More Time to Knit, I Would Finish Some of These
- Knitter (that’s me) vaguely recollects the time when she knit one project at a time and had never even considered doing otherwise.
- Then knitter got inspired by other knitters who seemingly start all kinds of projects and cast them aside (sometimes for years!) as if it were no big deal. Knitter has always been weak when it comes to peer pressure.
- Thus knitter finds herself with one Purl Soho Garter Earflap baby hat (brown/green, just needs the decreases at the top…baby due yesterday), one reworked Twist Shawl design (magenta), one Lesley-in-progress for the office knitalong (seashell pink), a second shawl design in the works, likely to be frogged and then frogged some more (white), and a sock (orange), which is actually said knitter’s weight loss strategy.
- The weight loss strategy isn’t working, in case you were curious. Apparently walking while knitting a sock burns calories at a degree insufficient to balance consumption of wine and brownies (and butter, Havarti, and chunks of fresh baguettes). A great tragedy indeed.
- Knitter honestly asked herself in a moment of reflection if she has the record five WIPs soley to better balance colors through her Instagram feed. Knitter decided this is not her motivation, although it does help provide visual balance. Lest anyone tire of seeing the same WIP on Instragram on consecutive days.
- Knitter notes she has just has to cast off the magenta shawl, hypothetically tonight, in which case she will be down to four WIPs. Progress.
- Knitter further notes that she is likely to loose a horrible scenario of Yarn Chicken on the above referenced magenta shawl’s cast off and will thus likely have to rip back three night’s worth of knitting to fix. In which case, there would be only un-progress and five WIPs would remain. Also, tears and cursing likely to result.
- Knitter is struggling to prioritize respective knits. Rationally, she thinks she should work on the baby hat because it is almost done and the mother is likely in labor RIGHT NOW. But, do babies really need hats in June when it’s 100 degrees (37.8 C)? Exactly. No rush after all. Let’s be real here.
- Knitter maintains a sock shouldn’t actually count as WIP anyway, as all knitters NEED sock projects at all times for background knitting (doctor’s offices, road construction, and other unplanned scenarios that require endless waiting). Socks are better defined as anxiety/anger management than an actual knitting project. Let’s be clear about definitions.
- Knitter would have even more WIPs but needs to first go by more yarn. She is almost out. (Try not to faint).
P.S. Did you see last week’s shawl release, Blast Off to the Sun?
P.P.S. Knitter is looking for test knitters. Email email@example.com if interested. Worsted. Due mid-August.